Ninja Blade is an action hack & slash game, with a huge dose of Quick Time Events, a dash of platforming and some on-rails shooting; it’s a mash-up of God of War with a bit of Prince of Persia, some Resident Evil and a lot of Dragon’s Lair. Oh, and some of the most insane Ninja action you’ll ever see. Anywhere. Ever.

What little plot there is goes like this: there have been a series of zombie-mutant outbreaks around the world, with effects very similar to an outbreak of Ouroboros or the T-Virus. Apparently this was caused by a ‘new species of hook worm’ known as Alpha-Worms and ‘not an infection’, as the intro firmly points out, although the first creature you see in the intro looks exactly like a Licker from Resident Evil. Anyway, these worm infected mutants are on a Wesker-style quest for total global saturation, declaring themselves the evolution of humanity. The only force that stands against them is the secret squad of Ninja of which you (generic videogame Ninja-looking guy Ken Ogawa) and your Dad are members. The latest outbreak is in Tokyo and it’s up to you to defeat the worms before the city has to be sterilised via an orbital strike. The story is told through cut scenes that range in quality from fairly decent to awful, with voice acting and scripting of a quality that will also be familiar to Resident Evil fans. It’s ‘Don’t open… that door’ terrible, although the line ‘We’ll drain your corpse and use it as a funhouse!’ from a worm-controlled human is certainly original. Other in-game sounds are decidedly average, although the music fits the action well.

Also a leftover from the 360 is the error message warning you that you haven’t selected a save device. The manual specifically tells you that this is a known error you can ignore, which someone apparently also told the programming team. This isn’t the only bug; voices occasionally disappear during cut scenes and the game hangs whenever you try to quit from the main menu. It’s worth noting that the game auto saves after each mission, with no option for a manual save at any time. A mission lasts for up to 60 minutes, so this can be a little frustrating and means that if a bug comes up, you can’t stop and reload unless you want to lose an hour of progress.

Most of the hack & slash part of the game is spent fighting basic humanoid mutants using your collection of swords and a Shuriken with elemental attack powers. The swords range from a big heavy sword which can break enemy armour and smash weak walls to a pair of quick-hitting Kratos-style sword chains which let you pull yourself across gaps. Defeating enemies drops red and yellow orbs; collect red orbs to upgrade your weapons and yellow orbs to restore your health. Perform a successful combo on an enemy and you get the chance to do a mini QTE for a more stylish kill and bonus orbs. Upgrading weapons unlocks new combos, but almost every enemy in the game can be killed using the most basic attack with the heavy sword.

Your Shuriken adds a little extra depth to the repetitive combat. The ‘Wind’ attack is occasionally needed to extinguish fires, the ‘Fire’ attack to burn through plants blocking your way or light an area, and ‘Lightning’ to reflect projectiles and paralyse enemies. The maps are very linear and there’s even a level later in the game that recycles entire sections of earlier levels, although there are a couple of moments of really exciting and imaginative level design that do stand out. One level set on a Jumbo Jet springs to mind; you approach in a gunship, manning the side gun and fighting off insects and a three headed Hydra, then land on the wing and have to run from one wing to the other fighting off exploding bugs, then the Hydra again, then a couple of worm controlled helicopters, then finally the Hydra again.

Provided you like your action OTT and tongue in cheek and you don’t care about plot, it’s a decent enough game with occasional glimpses of how good it could have been. It’s definitely more of a rental than a must buy, which is tricky for a PC title. Then again, it’s really a 360 game through and through so maybe you’d be better off renting that version instead.