Do you like trains? If you can answer yes to that question when asked in public then two things hold true. Number one, you need to find a more interesting hobby and number two, you will want to be playing this game. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a PC gamer, socially unacceptable hobbies are my bread and butter. But come on, trains?!
With that said, and me way up here on my pedestal, I get the pleasure of knocking myself off by telling you how much fun I had with this game. Sid Meier pretty much started the Sim/Management/Tycoon genre single-handedly and here he returns to his old train stomping ground, anorak in tow.
This remake uses the very lovely engine (ooh train puns…) that powered Civ 4, to provide you with a Simulated train-set of monumental proportions. Spanning the entire age of the rails from Mr Stevenson’s steam powered creations to the monstrous Diesel powered TGV, Railroads! caters for all tastes (you have a taste in trains? Weirdo!)
Thanks to the semi-cartoon visuals the game has an instant loveable charm that reminds you of your childhood; the quirky loading screen messages only add to that. You feel like it’s Christmas and that train set you always wanted is sitting there waiting for you under the tree. This illusion is cruelly shattered by the broken tutorial that leaves you with many unanswered questions about how you actually play the game thanks to its inability to proceed past the laying double track section; like a child opening their presents excitedly only to find a huge box of broken glass and salt. Also, like most of Britain’s trains the game can chug when busy (ooh more train puns!) but unlike Britain’s trains, it doesn’t come to a complete halt due to autumn leaves.
Trains are only part of the story here with finance being the overriding aim of the game. By creating the most profitable network with fast efficient service you’ll be doing what British Rail failed to. This will help you buy shares in your competitors (be they AI or online Fat Controllers) which will give you control of their assets and eliminate them from the game. You can control valuable patents and businesses by starting a bidding war for them and using your new assets to squeeze your competition out. It’s very tense stuff and provides some variety away from all the trains.
If you like games and you like trains this review was only ever going to be a diversion from the work you’re supposed to be doing whilst waiting to buy this game. The rest of world will still find a great deal of enjoyment tinkering with track laying, train buying, stock selling and time managing, even though you all think you’re too cool for trains.
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